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SOME GUIDELINES IN WRITING BUSINESS LETTERS IN TAINAN SPINNING COMPANY(PHAM THI BIEN HUONG 03AV4)

 

LAC HONG UNIVERSITY
FOREIGN LANGUAGE DEPARTMENT
 
 
 
RESEARCH TOPIC:
 
SOME GUIDELINES IN WRITING BUSINESS LETTERS IN TAINAN
 
 
SPINNING COMPANY
 
 
                          Prepare by :     PHAM THI BIEN HUONG
                          Class          :      03AV4
                          Advisor      :    NGUYEN THI KIM CHUNG, M.A
                       
 
 
 
DECEMBER, 2007
 
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
 
First of all, I would like to express my greatest gratitude to The Administration Board of Lac Hong University and all the teaching staff who helped me nearly 5 years, especially Ms. Nguyen Thi Kim Chung for her efforts to advise me during my work.
 
I would like to say a big thank to my family and friends for their help and encouragement while I am doing this assignment.
 
Also, I am very grateful to all authors of the sources which I used in this research, mainly from the internet and printed guidance to write an effective business letter.
 
Finally, thank to all of you who are giving a little bit time to interest in this topic and I hope that it will bring you something new and useful.
 
 
 
 
 
 
CHAPTER 1: INTRODUCTION
 
I.                  STATEMENT:
 
On doing my apprentice as a staff official of purchase department in Tainan Company, I mostly deal with customer by emails and I write many kinds of business letter such as application letter, thank-you letter, complaint letter, enquiry letter, order letter, etc. At the beginning I was in trouble with it because its format and language are different from the Vietnamese letters. In addition, I was not taught about business letter at the university so I was confused so much. I asked for the other staffs’ help but they did not have any guide documents. I think my teachers are the best ones in this field and I received things I wanted. These teachers provided me all about the business letter. However, I really want to create an official document to help my coworkers in writing a business letter so I do this research.
 
In fact, business letter has a general forms are different from this kind to others so how to write an effective letter is an important thing. The graduates were not prepared to do that well at the university so they were usually in trouble with letters. In this assignment, I would like to focus on the form of a business letter with content of each part and show some typical types of business letters. I also share several tips to write some kind of effective business letters.
 
II. SCOPES AND LIMITATION:
 
I would show the general format of the letter in easy way to remember that help graduates write a correct business letter. This is my distribution for my company where there are some official staffs having difficulties in writing commercial correspondence. This assignment presents some differences between Vietnamese and English document also points out some common mistakes that can avoid. Several useful tips will make the letter plentiful and create a good impression on the reader.
 
Although there are many kinds of business letter, I just focus on application letter, thank-you letter, complaint letter, enquiry letter and order letter which I often due with during my working time in the company.
 
 
 
III. ILLUSTRATION:
1.      Complaint letter datedFriday, August 31, 2007 Tainan Spinning. Vietnam
2.     Inquiry letter dated Thursday, September 7, 2007 Tainan Spinning Viet Nam
3.     Order letter dated Monday, July 29, 2007 Tainan Spinning Vietnam
4.     Order letter dated Friday, August 25, 2007 Tainan Spinning Vietnam
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
IV. LITERATURE REVIEW:
To learn ‘writing business letter’, Nguyen Linh Chi (2003) examined second year students from the University revealed that three common mistakes that most Vietnamese learners have are: styles, word use and letter format. Ashley (2003) also states that the common mistakes that Asian learners of English have when writing business letters is the affection of their mother tongue. Nguyen (2004) agues that the most difficulty for Vietnamese when writing business letter is choosing word and phrases to express their ideas. However, none of these writers mentioned anything about differences between English letter and Vietnamese letter, in my opinions, is one of main reasons that lead to mistakes in writing a business letter. With all my effort, I will try to show those points in my assignment. 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
CHAPTER 2: GENERAL BUSINESS LETTER FORMAT
 
Everyone feels confident when they write a letter to their friends, their family, their lover, etc. In informal letters, people can write anything they want including unnecessary things; they can use slang or polished language. However, people often deal with commercial correspondence, they must use formal language with right format for each kind. The grammar is also different; they often use passive voice and substantive than others. In fact, the format for writing a business letter falls into following basic styles:
-         Block format is the most popular one now. It means that all parts of the letter start at the left margin, the body of the letter is single spaced, with one line left between each paragraph and the paragraphs are not indented.

For example:

Bien Huong Pham
Tainan Vietnam,
Bien Hoa Industrial Zone,
Bien Hoa city, Dongnai Pro.,
Vietnam
25/06/2007
 
Ernie English
1405 BCIS Lab Lane,
Write City, TX 12345
Dear Mr. English:
Thank you for your Proforma Invoice which you sent us last time but maybe having something wrong. Please kindly advise us the prices of Item No.1 and No.15 in your proforma invoice No.V-047 as the last price
* In the Sales Confirmation No. ENW-4A132P item No.41,the old price of item No.1 is just JPY 530,
* In the Sales Confirmation No. ENW-5A104P item No.38, the old price of item No.15 is only JPY 4280.
 
We would also inform to you again about Item No.16 Air Cylinder GN-125-66, the serial No. 18517 is RY2 and MFG year 1980. It is used for Stationary auto doffer system of ring spinning frame. Please check the picture and the brand enclosed.
 
We are hopeful to receive your best prices soon.
Looking forward to hearing from you. 
 
Sincerely yours,
 
Bien Huong/Tainan VN. 
 

-         Modified block format is different from the block format chiefly in the placement of the date line, complimentary close and signature block that are aligned at the center, toward right margin or at the right margin.
For example:
 

Bien Huong Pham
Tainan Vietnam,
Bien Hoa Industrial Zone,
Bien Hoa city, Dongnai Pro.,
Vietnam
25/06/2007
 
Ernie English
1405 BCIS Lab Lane,
Write City, TX 12345
Dear Mr. English:
Thank you for your Proforma Invoice which you sent us last time but maybe having something wrong. Please kindly advise us the prices of Item No.1 and No.15 in your proforma invoice No.V-047 as the last price
* In the Sales Confirmation No. ENW-4A132P item No.41,the old price of item No.1 is just JPY 530,
* In the Sales Confirmation No. ENW-5A104P item No.38, the old price of item No.15 is only JPY 4280.
 
We would also inform to you again about Item No.16 Air Cylinder GN-125-66,the serial No. 18517 is RY2 and MFG year 1980. It is used for Stationary auto doffer system of ring spinning frame. Please check the picture and the brand enclosed.
 
We are hopeful to receive your best prices soon.
Looking forward to hearing from you. 
                             Sincerely yours,
 
Bien Huong/Tainan VN. 
 

-         Modified semi-block format features a date line aligned either slightly to the right of center or flush right. Its inside address and salutation are aligned flush left, while the paragraphs of the body are indented five or ten spaces. Its complimentary close and signature block are aligned under the date, either slightly to the right.
For example:
 

Bien Huong Pham
Tainan Vietnam,
Bien Hoa Industrial Zone,
Bien Hoa city, Dongnai Pro.,
Vietnam
25/06/2007
 
Ernie English
1405 BCIS Lab Lane,
Write City, TX 12345
Dear Mr. English:
Thank you for your Proforma Invoice which you sent us last time but maybe having something wrong. Please kindly advise us the prices of Item No.1 and No.15 in your proforma invoice No.V-047 as the last price
* In the Sales Confirmation No. ENW-4A132P item No.41,the old price of item No.1 is just JPY 530,
* In the Sales Confirmation No. ENW-5A104P item No.38, the old price of item No.15 is only JPY 4280.
 
We would also inform to you again about Item No.16 Air Cylinder GN-125-66,the serial No. 18517 is RY2 and MFG year 1980. It is used for Stationary auto doffer system of ring spinning frame. Please check the picture and the brand enclosed.
 
We are hopeful to receive your best prices soon.
Looking forward to hearing from you. 
                              Sincerely yours,
 
Bien Huong/Tainan VN. 
 
 

     Block format is the most popular one now because it is formal than other one. The style in business letter is also different and diversified from the Vietnamese letter. Our business letter is formatted in only style with specific letter name after the title of the country but in commercial correspondence, it does not have anymore. The content of each part is also not same as our letter. The layout of business letter includes sender’s address, date, inside address, salutation, body and closing, the differences also prove below.
 
1.     Sender’s address:
The heading of a letter contains the address of the sender (you). Most businesses have letterheads or return addresses with the information already printed. It includes the name of your company, your address (street/road, city/province, country and post code), phone and fax number and e-mail address may be include if necessary. If there is not a printed letterhead you should put your return address at the top right hand side of the letter.
For example:
678 Nguyen Dinh Chieu Street
Tan Binh District
Ho Chi Minh City
Tel: (08)888999.
It is not similar to the Vietnamese; in the heading, your letter must have title of the country at the center. If there is a letterhead, it will be indented on the left hand side and the title of the country is aligned on the right hand side. It has no individual address in the heading.
For example:
Cộng Hòa Xã Hội Chủ Nghĩa Việt Nam
Độc Lập – Tự Do – Hạnh Phúc
THƯ HỎI GIÁ
 
In case, your letter has one more page you should print only the first page of your letter on the letterhead stationery. All following pages will be written on the regular blank paper. Do not number the first page, but number all following pages.
The pages following page 1 should look like this in the place of the header:
Ms. Loan Tran
Page 2
October 15, 2007
 
2.     Date:
The date line is used to indicate the date the letter was written. However, if your letter is not completed in that day or maybe longer, you can use the day it was finished in the date line. If you use a company letterhead, type the date line three lines below the heading. If you use a return address type the date line directly below the return address. There are two ways to write date: the first one is day/month/year and the second one is month/day/year.
For example:
January 1st 2005
Or 1st January 2005
 
The date line is also different from date in Vietnamese letter, it is usually put two spaces below the title of the country. It has only format day/month/year and often has your address the place where you write the letter before the date. Your place is written in general like your city or your town.
For example:
Biên Hòa, ngày 30 tháng 10 năm 2007.
 
The month should not be written in number because it is easy to make misunderstanding. For instance, in British English 12.9.2007 means September 12th 2007 but in American English, it may be understood December 9th 2007. Sometimes, we can shorten the date like Jan for January, Feb for February…or giving up st, nd, rd, th in 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th,…
 
3.     Inside address:
The next part in our format of writing a business letter is the inside address. This is the name and address of the recipient – the person or business you are writing to. It is also put under the sender’s address and date and on the left hand side. It is not presented in the Vietnamese letter.
 
It is always best to write to a specific individual at the firm. If you do not have the person’s name, do some research by calling the company or speaking to employees from the company. In the worst case when there is no information particular person, the possible way is to write down the name of the company and send it right to the company’s address.
 
If the name of the receiver is unclear, the title or the status can be also used in the address. For example, The Sales Manager, The Business Development Director or even Purchasing Department if you are not sure for his/her position in the company. Usually, people will not mind being addressed by a higher title than they actually possess.
 
In some cases, many special titles should be used in the address such as Dr. (or Doctor), Prof. (Professor), Capt. (Capital), Maj. (major), Col. (Colonel), Gen. (General) and Sir (for royal addressing). You can use those words when you are sure of their office.
 
Finally, the inside address was often written in this order: receiver’s name, company’s name, house/Building name and number, street/highway/road, city/province/town with postcode and country. For international addresses, type the name of the country in all capital letter on the last line.
For example:
Martin Lu
Tainan spinning (VN)
No.9, road 17A, Bien Hoa Industrial Zone
Dong Nai Province, VIET NAM
 This part does not exist in Vietnamese letter, the inside address have just been written in the envelope.
 
4.     Salutation:
Although salutation is just a short and simple sentence, it is an important part of the letter. It does not only show the writer’s expectation to the reader but also create a good impression on the reader to go on reading the rest of the letter. Therefore, you should be sure that you use suitable salutation to show the relationship between you and the recipient.
 
You should use the same name as the inside address, include the personal title. In case the letter is sent to the company without any specific recipient, the salutation can be something like “Dear Sirs”. If you write to a strange person without information of gender and status you can begin with “Dear Sir or Madam”. It is also acceptable to use the full name in the salutation if you can not determine gender. For example, you might write “Dear Chris Harmon” if you are unsure of Chris’s gender. When the name is clear of course, you can write “Dear Mr. White” but the salutation does not include shorten name like “Dear Mr. J. White”. It is somewhat similar to the Vietnamese letter but the recipient must be identified clearly with his/her title job. If you do not know the name of the recipient, you can write his/her company’s name you can not use general salutation “Dear Sir or Madam” as in English letter.  
For example:
Kính gửi: Ông Martin Lu, Trưởng Phòng Vật Tư Công Ty Hữu Hạn sợi Tainan.
End the salutation by colon are optional. Only in informal, personal correspondence is the salutation followed by a comma. It is not the same as in Vietnamese letter, we often use exclamation mark at the end of salutation.
 
5.     Body:
 
This is the most important in a letter because it presents reasons or problems to write the letter. When writing a business letter, be careful to remember that conciseness is very important. In the first paragraph, consider a friendly opening and then a statement of the main point. The next paragraph should begin justifying the importance of the main point. In the next few paragraphs continue justification with background information and support details. The closing paragraph should restate the purpose of the letter and some cases request some type of action. There is usually a space between two paragraphs. The body is similar to Vietnamese letter.
 
6.     Complimentary closing:
 
The closing begins at the same horizontal point as your date and one line after the last body paragraph. Capitalize the first word only (for example: Thank you) and leave four lines between the closing and the sender’s name for a signature. If the letter begins “Dear Sir/Madam” or “Dear Sir and Madam” the complimentary should be “Yours faithfully”. If the letter begins with a personal name e.g. Dear Mr. James, Dear Ms. White it should be “Yours sincerely”. A letter to someone you know well may close with more important “Best wishes”. A comma after the complimentary close is optional.
In Vietnamese letter, there is not complimentary as in English. The closing is often date of writing letter and the writer’s position. It is aligned toward the right margin.
For example:
Biên Hòa, ngày 30 tháng 10 năm 2007
Trưởng phòng Vật Tư
 
7.     Signature:
 
Type your name on the fourth line following the complimentary close, your job title should be on the line directly below your name. Use the space between the complimentary close and your typed name for your signature.
For example:
Yours sincerely,
 
(Sign your name here)
 
John Doe
Sales Manager.
          In Vietnamese letter, the title job is usually written below the date and address and then signature. Vietnamese do not write their job below their name.
Besides these above parts, the business letter has also other parts such as references, copies, enclosure…but the obligated parts of a typical business letter should have:
Heading
Date
Inside address
Salutation
Body
Closing
Signature
Typed name.
 
 
SAMPLE FORMAT:
 
Heading:                      3519 Front Street
(Sender’s address)       Mount Celebres, CA 65286
Date:                            October 5, 2004
Inside address:             Ms. Betty Johnson
                                     Accounts Payable
                                     The Cooking Store
                                     765 Berliner Plaza
                                     Industrial Point, CA 68534
Salutation:                   Dear Ms Johnson:
Body:                          It has come to my attention that your company, the   Cooking Store has been late with paying their invoices for the past three months.
     In order to encourage our customers to pay for their invoices before the due date, we have implemented a discount model where we'll give you 2% off your invoice if you pay us within 10 days of receiving the invoice.
                         I hope that everything is going well for you and your company. You are one of our biggest customers, and we appreciate your business. If you have any questions, you can feel free to contact me at (555) 555-5555.
Closing:                     Sincerely,
Signature block:          Signature
                                    Bob Powers
                                    Accounts Receivable
 
CHAPTER 3: CONTENT AND STYLE
 
Although business letter has general format styles, to write an effective letter is very difficult because each kind of letter has a particular content and style. It is very necessary for the students to learn more about it. In spite of usefulness less in their learning process, they will need in the first step when they do things in applying for job, working as a staff official, a secretary, a manager assistant….
 
Content and style of a commercial correspondence is the most difficult section in writing a letter so it requires the writer’s knowledge so much. They must be sensitive, their saying is so clarify and persuasive to get the attention from the reader. Organizing their information logically with concise language is also an effective way should remember. Then I would like to inform some steps should be taken before writing a business letter.
 
 
 
 
1.     Planning:
 
Planning is similar to draw out an outline before writing an essay. It is very essential step before writing an important document. Firstly, you must identify who will receive your letter and what the purpose of the letter is. Secondly, you note down the main points of each paragraph with their supported ideas. If you do that, you can avoid repeating the ideas and know your letter has enough information or not. Then, read all of notes again and think about right order for them, the most important thing should put at the beginning and less important one is later.
A letter is often divided into three parts: the introduction, body and closing. The first is very important because it sets the tone of the letter and creates the impression. You would introduce yourself and your company with particular purpose of the letter. You also thank for their correspondent or their support if replying to an enquiry. The following is an example
 
 
 
 
 

Thank you for your enquiry of 12 August which I received today. We can certainly supply you with the industrial floor covering you ask about. Enclosed you will find a catalogue illustrating our wide range of products currently used in factories and offices throughout the world.
 
 

 
The second part is also the main one of a letter; it will concentrate on the points that need to be made, questions you want to ask. As this depends on the type of letter that you are writing but things you write should be clearly, fully and logically. If you make the reader understand the main point easily, you may succeed a part.
In the final part, you may briefly restate the most important points in the body. You should thank and encourage further information or other form contact that you look forward to hearing him or her soon with expression “looking forward to”, “if you need further information, don’t hesitate to…”
 
 
 

Once again thank you for writing us and please do not hesitate to contact us if you would like for further information. Looking forward to hearing from you soon.
 
 

2.     Language used:
 
Language used in the letter should be easy to understand and not wordy to make the impossible misunderstanding. It is not so simple and short that it becomes rude. It is important to get the right tone in the letter. This means that you should aim for neutral tone avoid pompous and colloquial language or slang. In addition, the letter should not only be expressed persuasively but also accuracy especially abbreviation, number, preposition and spelling. Be careful with them although they are familiar with us, we are easy to get mistakes. In English, there are many tenses it is different from Vietnamese so using language also has some problems.
  
 
 
 
 
3.     Some typical types of business letter:
 
a.      Application letter:
In the introduction you should simply state why you are writing to them. The main body of the letter is very important should be two paragraphs. Here is where can tell them your experience skills, highlight what you are specialize in the level that you have reached. This paragraph should direct the reader to your CV. You must show to them that you have what they need and sometimes have more things than they ask for. In the closing paragraph, it should thank to recipient for giving you the opportunity to apply, ask for an interview and tell how they can reach you.
For example: (next page)
 

6123 Farrington Road
Apt. B11
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
January 11, 2005
Taylor, Inc.
694 Rockstar Lane
Durham, NC 27708
Dear Human Resources Director:
I just read an article in the News and Observer about Taylor's new computer center just north of Durham. I would like to apply for a position as an entry-level programmer at the center.
I understand that Taylor produces both in-house and customer documentation. My technical-writing skills, as described in the enclosed resume, are well suited to your company. I am a recent graduate of DeVry Institute of Technology in Atlanta with an Associate's Degree in Computer Science. In addition to havingtaken a broad range of courses, I served as a computer consultant at the college's computer center where I helped train computer users on new systems.
I will be happy to meet with you at your convenience and discuss how my education and experience match your needs. You can reach me at my home address, at (919) 233-1552, or at krock@devry.alumni.edu.
                                                                                                    Sincerely,    
                                                                                            Raymond Krock
 
 

 
b.     Thank you letter:
You should remind the employer who you are and impress them your courtesy in the introduction paragraph. Reaffirm thing anything you liked about the organization and any ways you believe you will meet their need in the body paragraph. Show your enthusiasm and continue to interest in their field in the next paragraph. Closing by saying you are thanking very much for their time and consideration and looking forward to hearing from them.
For example:
 1421 West Fifth Street
Boise, Idaho 83725

June 15, 200x
Mr. Howard Smith
Personnel Manager
Modern Advertising, Inc.
1440 Michigan Avenue
Chicago, Illinois 60611
Dear Mr. Smith:
Thank you for the opportunity to interview with you last Thursday, June 12, to discuss the position of copywriter at Modern Advertising, Inc. I was impressed with the enthusiasm you displayed for Modern Advertising’s future and the helpfulness of your office personnel. Learning about Modern’s present media campaign for the Houston Sausage Company was exciting and demonstrated your creative approach to advertising. Modern Advertising is a company with which I wish to be associated.
Your description of the special qualifications needed for this position was especially interesting. My ability to work under pressure and meet tight deadlines has already been proven in the advertising position I held with the Columbia Missourian. As I stated at our meeting, I enjoy the challenge of a competitive environment in which success is based on achievement.
I would also like to mention that since our meeting, I have received the College Reporter’s Award for an article of mine published in the Columbia Missourian. This is my first national award, and I am quite encouraged by this approval of my work.
Again, thank you for considering me for the position of copywriter. I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Sincerely,
 
Lisa Martin
 
 
c.     Complaint letter:
At the opening, complaint as soon as you realize the mistakes has been made. No matter how angry you are feeling never let this show in the tone of your letter. In the body, you should:
-         Explain exactly what the problem is.
-         Indicate when and where the goods or service under complaint were purchased (give as much detail as possible to identify the item).
-         Express exactly what you want from the firm responsible – replacement item/service, refund etc.
Finally, closing with saying you are hoping the problem will be solve soon with kindest cooperation of both sides and looking forward to hearing from them soon.
For example:
65 Market Street
Val Haven, CT 95135
June 30, 2004
Customer Service
Cool Sports, LLC
8423 Green Terrace Road
Asterville, WA 65435
Dear Sir or Madam:
I have recently ordered a new pair of soccer cleats (item #6542951) from your website on June 21. I received the order on June 26. Unfortunately, when I opened it I saw that the cleats were used. The cleats had dirt all over it and there was a small tear in front of the part where the left toe would go. My order number is AF26168156.
To resolve the problem, I would like you to credit my account for the amount charged for my cleats, I have already went out and bought a new pair of cleats at my local sporting goods store so sending another would result in me having two pairs of the same cleats.
Thank you for taking the time to read this letter. I have been a satisfied customer of your company for many years and this is the first time I have encountered a problem. If you need to contact me, you can reach me at (777) 555-5555.

Sincerely,
Signature
Ken Thomas
d.     Enquiry letter:
At first, you should introduce sort of organization you are. In the next paragraph (body), if you ask for catalogues or price lists of the good you should point out particular catalogue include model and series number. Sometimes, you ask for an item which was produced a long time ago but now you do not know the supplier still produce or not, besides model, catalogue, series No. you should enclose the picture. It is helpful for supplier to find and to quota it with best prices. Moreover, you can also ask for goods, service, sample, pattern, demonstration with method of payment and discounts. It is important that you should define the specific you need. Usually, a simple “thank you” is sufficient to close an enquiry. However, you could mention that a reply would be appreciated or that certain term or guarantee would be necessary.
For example:
Peter Crane
F. Lynch & Co. Ltd
Nesson House
Newell Street
Birmingham B33EF.
 
September 02, 2007
 
Linda Lowe
Sanders & Lowe Ltd
Planter House
Princes Street
London EC17DQ
 
Dear Ms. Linda:
You were recommended to us by your trade association and I am writing to on behalf of our principals in Canada who are interested in importing chinaware from England
 
Could you send us your lasted catalogue and price list, quoting your most competitive prices? Our principals are a large chain store in North America and will probably place substantial orders if the quality and prices of your products are suitable.
 
We hope to hear from you soon.
 
Yours sincerely,
 
 
Peter Crane
Chief Buyer.
 
e.      Order letter:
In the introduction, make it clear that there is an order letter. For example, “please kindly find enclosed our order No….” In the body, you can confirm the term of payment, discounts, schedule of delivery, method of delivery and packing. To the method of delivery you can show the forwarder if the fee of freight which the supplier uses is too expensive. Finally, hoping to receive the supplier’s confirmation or shipment soon and thank you very much for their support is the best saying in the closing.
For example:
Rodriguez, Inc.
2255 West 189th Street
New York, NY11250
Telephone: 212-598-1534
 
November 16, 2006
 
Mr. George Holmes, Manager
Baxter and Halloway, Inc.
Smithville, ST 56789
 
Dear Mr. Homles:
 
Please accept this order for immediate shipment to Rodriguez, Inc., Wood Product Division, 2255 West 189th Street, New York, NY 11250.
 
Quantity
Description
Unit Price
Total
1800
No. 202 T. Hinges, Brass Plate
$ 1.50 pr.
$ 1,350
600
No. 78 Corner Braces, Brass Plate
$ 1.75 ea.
$ 1,050
                                                                             TOTAL:         $ 2,400.
 
An unexpected flurry of orders has depleted our stock. Therefore, any assistance that you can give in expediting our order and delivery will be greatly appreciated.
 
Sincerely,
 
 
Paul Thomas
Purchasing Agent
 
4.     Some other tips:
 
a. Paper, envelope and ink:
It is vital to use quality paper and envelope with the name and address spelt correctly when writing a commercial correspondence because both of them are two important parts that the receiver can elevate your expectation to them. They are also the first thing to create a good expression on the receiver. It is wise to make sure the envelope matches the size of the paper.
Learn to write on unruled paper. If you find it too difficult to write without line, you can use a sheet of ruled paper placed underneath as a guide. It is impolite when writing a letter on a half sheet of paper or on a torn sheet but it is always used in business for a special purpose.
 A black ink or blue black ink is accepted standard ink through the world. You should not use fancy colored ink or offensive color ink because it is very offensive to the eye and no longer deemed elegant for example a rusty, brown, blue, green…
 
b. Use of figures and abbreviation:
One of ways to save time which is favorable in writing commercial correspondent is shorten the date for instance “2-9-2006”. It means ninth day, second month of 2006. The day of month is sometimes Sept. 3 and the year is implied because the letter is written in the same year. Address is also written in brief such as “No.27, Tran Hung Dao St.,”. Figures are used in state the sum of money as “$15,000”, “17 barrels” or “50 percent”. But be careful with them because it is easy to cause confusion such as misunderstanding between month and day, the problem is very serious when misuse of point (.) and comma (,) in number. In English, 2.987 does not mean two thousand nine hundred eighty seven as in Vietnam, it only two and nine hundred eighty seven. On the contrary, with the comma 2,987 are two thousand nine hundred eighty seven.
Abbreviation is the most usage in business letter because it is not only easy to understand but also save a lot of time. It makes your letter become professional and businesslike. There is a system of international shorting words which is accepted in the world:
 
“A.M”, “M”, “P.M” for forenoon, noon, afternoon
“Inst” for instant – the present month
“ult” for ultimo – last month
“prox” for proximo – next month
“cc” for carbon copy
“bcc” for blind carbon copy
“Enc/Encl. for enclose
“EXW” for ex works
“FCA” for free carrier
“FAS” for alongside ship
“FOB” for free on board
“CFR” for cost and freight
“CIF” for cost, insurance and freight
“CPT” for carriage paid to
“CIP” for carriage and insurance paid to
“LCL” for less than container load
“COD” for cash on delivery
“VAT” for value added tax
“L/C” for letter of credit
“i.e” for id est (it is)
“e.g” for exempli gratia “for example”
“etc” for et cetera – and the rest or and so on
“v” or “v.s” for versus
“vol” for volume
“Ltd” for limited
 
c. Useful phrases:
The use of lexical approach is essential for successful language acquisition in English so the student should prepare for himself his vocabulary which is suitable for specific purpose. For this reason, I would like to show some helpful phrases that improve their letter become colorful and variety.
 


-         To agree with
-         As far as I am concerned
-         As follows
-         As per invoice
-         As requested
-         As soon as possible
-         At your expense
-         Awaiting your reply
-         To be delighted to
-         To be held responsible for
-         To be arrears with payment
-         To be difficulty
-         To be overrun with other
-         To come to decision
-         To come to an agreement
-         Goods listed below
-         Hereby
-         In our favor
-         In partial payment
-         To look forward to
-         To meet customer’s requirement
-         To notify in advance about
-         On advanced payment
-         On receipt of the order
-         On short notice
-         Order to be confirmed
-         Our best attention
-         Our offer still open
-         Please allow us
-         Please send us instruction
-         Prices are increasing
-         To prefer to
-         To sell at the best
-         Similar to sample – up to sample
-         To suit the quality – to meet the quality
-         The goods are sold out
-         The goods are available in our house ware
-         The goods arrived in good condition
-         We apologize for the delay
-         We are sorry to inform you
-         We hope we will receive the goods soon
-         We would appreciate it if you could answer
-         With two weeks’ notice
-         Would you please let us know
 


 
 
 
CHAPTER 4: COMMON MISTAKES AND RECOMMENDATIONS
I.                  MISTAKES:
 
1.     Mistakes of planning:
One of serious mistakes of the students is the mistakes of planning because they do not usually write down a planning before writing the letter. This leads to lack of information and ideas. Moreover, the main points are not put in the right order so the reader is easy to misunderstand. The wrong organization also makes the receiver difficult to get information and persuade him or her immediately.
For example:
Dear Sir,
I have received your quotation and samples for each item. I wonder if you can supply more samples for experiments I will order many products in the future.
The prices you offered are too high so I am thinking about it so much. Could you negotiate about selling prices if I buy in large quantity?
We hope that we will have chance to cooperate with your company in near future.
Yours truly,
 
2.     Mistakes of format :
 
Another common mistake of the student is the format of the letter. They are confused to the address of the receiver, the sender and the date and their order because the heading of English letter is not similar to the Vietnamese letter. They do not know where to put comma or full stop. Sometimes, they use the exclamation mark (like Vietnamese) after the salutation.
 
Besides, the length of the letter is also a problem. They may write too long the letter becomes wordy with some details are repeated or do not related to the purpose of the letter. Some letter is too short; they may use brief language and lack of information so they do not get good impression on the reader. Both of long and short letter are difficult for the reader to define the main purpose of the letter and take their attention well.
 
 
 
 
For example:
Lever Estate,
Scarborough, Yorkshire,
YO11 3BS.
12th Jan 2002
The Sales Manager,
Johnson, Ward & Co.Ltd
68 Cowley Road,
Birminham,12,
 
3.     Mistakes of language usage:
 
The students often use complicated and colloquial language that makes the reader embarrass and be in trouble with them. They are also influenced by Vietnamese language when translating into English so it is difficult for foreigner to understand. They are not familiar with business expression and phrase so their letter is so boring and informal. Besides, lexical problem they still get mistakes in grammar like changing in tense, using impersonal status, form of verb. These kinds of mistakes are difficult to improve without the effort of continuously practicing. They require the writer’s knowledge and ability to apply the language so much.
 
Besides three kinds of mistakes, the students also make some errors that can not build their letter perfectly. However, three above mistakes are the most serious ones so I just focus some recommendations can help everyone avoid them.
 
II. RECOMMENDATIONS:
 
1.     Planning advices:
In order to prepare well for your letter, you should have a good planning. Use a clear and direct writing style that uses simple words and straight forward phrases. Make sure that your thought follows a logical procession, focus on the main point with necessary supporting detail. All of them are organized in corrected order with transpositions between paragraphs with bring you a good mark easily from the reader. In addition, to get reader’s belief you can quote suitable references and statistic. Finally, close your letter with appreciation and consideration, “looking forward to…” is often said in this part. Do not take a few minutes to look your planning back before writing; this will be helpful for you.
 
2.     Format advices:
You should remember the order of address of the receiver, sender and date. It is easy to do that. Also, unify the style from the top to the bottom. The length of the letter should be long enough to explain exactly what the sender needs to say and the receiver needs to know. I think the mistake of format is easy to correct it just depends on the writer’s carefulness.
 
3.     Language usage advice:
Do not use slang anywhere in your letter, it will make your letter informal and the reader do not have good impression especially for the first time. For example “I have to scouring off you”, you can replace “I need a loan”.
Make sure that you avoid language that is specific to gender, race or religion in all business letter, either to other businesses or to customers. For example, use “workforce” instead of “manpower” or “chairperson” rather than “chairman”.
One more important thing, you should not invent abbreviations or acronyms by yourself because the reader can be confused to guest them, it is easy to get misunderstanding. You can standard ones which are accepted through the world like L/C, cc, FOB…
You should avoid writing colloquial language such as: “Don’t worry, I’ll get your money back”, you can use “your loan will be repaid” for that purpose.
 
Furthermore, the mistakes in grammar usually influence the tone of the letter. Impersonal is better than personal because you write the letter to serve for the company’s purposes not to solve yourself problem. For example, “I will pay more attention” will change “We will pay more attention. The full form is used more in the important document because it makes everything clearly and formally. For instance, “I’ll…” transfer to “I shall…” The passive voice increases belief more than the active e.g. “You have not settle your bill yet” is replaced to “payment of your bill is outstanding”. Especially, present tense is preferred than other. For instance, “I’m purchasing…” is “I purchase…”.
 
 
CHAPTER 5: CONCLUSION
 
In sum up, in this assignment I would like to collect some useful ways for writing commercial correspondence to help graduate students and my coworkers. The first thing of work, I would like to display the general format of a business letter with sender’s address, date, inside address, salutation, body, closing, and signature. I have already showed a model one for illustrating clearly. I think it is the easiest part to remember in this assignment. The second part is the most difficult, it is content and style. Each kind of letters have a particular content and style so the writer is required to have a good basic knowledge with ability to apply the language. I would also show some common mistakes in the next part with helpful tips to deal with those problems. Some sample letters for different purposes also put in the end of this assignment for references.
 
I hope that this assignment not guidance will bring you some things new and useful. I am not sure that it will help you write a perfect letter at less it can build a basic knowledge about business letter and have a correct letter.
 
CHAPTER 6: APPENDICES
I.                   SAMPLE JOB APPLICATION LETTER   
John Merton
456 Main Street
Raleigh, NC 28763
September 31, 2007
Christine Rennick
Principal Engineer
Aerosol Monitoring and Analysis, Inc.
P.O. Box 233
Gulltown, MD 21038

Dear Ms. Rennick:

I wish to make an application for the position of Sales Manager within the Qualities branch of your Organistion as advertised in the Turkish Daily News on 15 August 2005.

I believe that my enclosed resume will demonstrate that I have the characteristics and experience necessary for this position. In addition, I'd like to mention how my skills and experience makes me a particularly strong candidate for the position.

As a promoter for Kentech Training at the 1997 Paris Air Show, I discussed Kentech's products with marketers and sales personnel from around the world. I also researched and wrote reports on new product development and compiled information on aircraft industry trends. The knowledge of the aircraft industry I gained from this position would help me analyze how Aerosol products can meet the needs of regular and prospective clients, and the valuable experience I gained in promotion, sales, and marketing would help me use that information effectively.

I would welcome the opportunity to discuss these and other qualifications with you. Should you be interested, please contact me on (212) 555-0118.

I look forward to meeting with you to discuss the ways my skills may best serve Aerosol Monitoring and Analysis.

                                                              Sincerely yours,


                                                                 John Merton

Enclosure: resume
 
II. SAMPLE THANK-YOU LETTER FOLLOWING A JOB INTERVIEW
12489 Elm Street
Manchester, NH 03101
603.664.5980

August 29, 2006

Frank Byrnes, Esq.
Doyle and Dorn
63 Rumford Street
Concord, NH 03301

Dear Mr. Byrnes:

It was a pleasure meeting with you and experiencing the opportunity you have to offer. I appreciate and thank you for providing me with the time to interview for this chance to become your law clerk this summer.

Since our meeting, my interest and excitement about the position has only intensified. I feel as though I have a thorough understanding of the requirements and responsibilities, as well as a new appreciation for the challenges and opportunities that this position affords. I am particularly impressed with the range of work you perform, and the variety of clients you serve. I am confident that my wide–ranging skill set and experience will enable me to make a valuable contribution to your team.

I hope I was able to provide you with sufficient information about my qualifications and experience to give you a clear picture of what I have to offer you. If you have any other questions, please feel free to call me.

Thank you again for your time and consideration.


Sincerely,

Steve Smithson
Steve Smithson
 
III. SAMPLE COMPLAINT LETTER:
M. Maurice Lancelot
Director
M. Lancelot SARL
703 rue Metairie de Saysset
F-34000 Montpellier
 
5 August, 2007
Mr. K. Winford
K. Winford & Co. Ltd
Preston New Road
Blackpool
Lancashire FY4 4UL
 
Dear Mr. Winford
I have received your July statement for $ 3,280.64 but notice it contains a number or errors.
1. Invoice Y1146 for $256.00 has been debited twice.
2. No credit has been listed for the wallpaper (Cat. No. WR114) which I returned in July. Your credit note No. CN118 for $ 19.00 refers to this.
3. You have charged for a delivery of paintbrushes, invoice No. Y1162 for $62.00, but I neither ordered nor received them. Could you check your delivery book?
I have deducted a total of $337.00 from your statement and will send you a draft for $2,943.64 once I have your confirmation of this amount.
Yours sincerely,
 
 
Maurice Lancelot
Director
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
IV. SAMPLE ENQUIRY LETTER:
Tainan Spinning Co. Ltd(Vietnam)
No. 9, Road 17A
Bien Hoa Industrial Zone
Dong Nai Province
VIETNAM
21 September 2007
 
 
B. Kaasen
Bredgade 51
DK1260
Copenhagen
DENMARK
 
 
Dear sirs:

With reference to your advertisement in yesterday's Economist, we are currently looking for manufacturers, exporters or suppliers of electrical products in London area. Our requirements are high-quality components and fast technical support.

We are manufacturers of audio, video, communications, and information technology products for the consumer and professional markets. As we are planning to increase the capacity of our fabrication facilities in England, we are looking for local distributors who can provide quality electrical material for our new research laboratories. We are interested in lighting products, power supply units, transformers and converters. Essential condition is the electrical systems safety standards for the employee workplaces.
We are looking to start with samples in small quantities and go up from there.

Could you please send us your latest catalogue and price list, including detailed product datasheets. Would you kindly advise us of your terms of payment, any quantity discount available and details about transport and delivery.
I look forward to hearing from you.

                                                                Yours faithfully


                                                                   Quan Hung
 
V. SAMPLE ORDER LETTER:
Linda Lowe
MacKenzie Bros Ltd
1-5 Whale Drive
Ontario
CANADA
October 9, 2007
 
Mr. John Merton
Satex S.p.A
Via di Pietra Papa
00146 Roma
ITALY
 
Dear Mr. Merton:
Please find the attached an order (R1432) from our principal, MacKenzie Bros Ltd, 1-5 Whale Drive, Dawson, Ontario, Canada.
 
We would instruct you that the 60 sets of crockery ordered should be packed in 6 crates, 10 sets per crate, with each piece individual wrapped, and the crates marked clearly with their name, the words “fragile” and “crockery, and numbered 1-6.
 
We have agreed to pay by letter of credit, which we discussed on the phone last week, and we would like delivery before the end of this month, which should be no problem as there are regular sailings from Liverpool.
 
If the colors we have chosen are not in stock, we will accept an alternative provided the designs are those on the order.
 
Please send any further correspondence relating to shipment or payment direct to MacKenzie Bros, and let us have a copy of the commercial invoice when it is made up.
 
                                                                                                     Best regards,
 
 
                                                                                                     Linda Lowe
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
References:
Ashley. A. (2003). Oxford handbook of commercial correspondence. Oxford University Press.
(1988) Webster’s guide to business correspondence. Merriam-Webster Inc., United States of America.
Nguyen Quoc Hung M.A (1999). So tay thu tin thuong mai quoc te. Nha xuat ban thanh pho Ho Chi Minh
Report of Nguyen Linh Chi (2003). Writing Business letter.
 
 
 
 
 
 
TABLE CONTENT
Content                                                                                              Pages
Acknowledgements...............................................................................................                              ............................................................................................................................                              ............................................................................................................................                             
 
CHAPTER 1: INTRODUCTION.............................................................. 1
    I. Statement........................................................................................... 1
   II. Scopes and limitation......................................................................... 2
 III. Illustration......................................................................................... 3
 IV. Literature review................................................................................ 4
CHAPTER 2: GENERAL BUSINESS LETTER FORMAT....................... 5
        1. Sender’s address......................................................................... 11
        2. Date............................................................................................ 13
        3. Inside address............................................................................. 14
        4. Salutation.................................................................................... 16
        5. Body........................................................................................... 17
        6. Complimentary closing................................................................ 18
        7. Signature..................................................................................... 19
CHAPTER 3: CONTENT AND STYLE.................................................. 22
        1. Planning...................................................................................... 23
        2. Language used............................................................................. 25
        3. Some typical types of business letter............................................ 26
        4. Some other tips........................................................................... 37
 
CHAPTER 4: COMMON MISTAKES AND RECOMMENDATIONS.... 42
I.                   Mistakes................................................................................... 42
      1. Mistakes of planning................................................................. 42
      2. Mistakes of format.................................................................... 43
      3. Mistakes of language usage....................................................... 44
II.        Recommendations................................................................... 45
      1. Planning advices....................................................................... 45
      2. Format advices......................................................................... 46
      3. Language usage advices............................................................ 46
CHAPTER 5: CONCLUSION................................................................. 48
CHAPTER 6: APPENDICES   
 
 

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